Where did my mind go?

Where did my mind go? Where in my world did my mind go? I feel as though I'm losing track of where I was planning to go. And as much as I try, it seems that for the life of me I can't remember. How could I so easily have forgotten my dreams. There was a time when nobody could tell me nothing about  sing a strong man or having strong character and being an individual. I always had optimistic thoughts of reaching for the top. And now I seem to only be reaching for what's I front of me, only seeing things directly in front of me. Where did the visionary in me go? Where did the romantic in me go? Where did the artist in me go? I find myself pleasing the world and yet it is never yielded through my happiness. Why did the happiness...go?       I seem to begin and end my days in this destructive meditation. Destroying the temple my parents helped me build. How can I repair what I may very well have dismantled. I used to consider myself the leader of a lost ideal. The last solider of a wondrous empire. Lost in reality with a memories from a utopian dynasty. And then today I began to wonder...why?     Why do I feel alone? Some days I do long for a woman to help me out of these troubling thoughts, and yet I know this will not relieve my desire. Why do I feel alone? The. It hit me; where did my mind go? How did I lose track of the world I grew up dreaming of? Where did my soldiers go?there used to be a time when strong and weak men fought for ideals. They fought for our women. Too commonly do we blame women for falling victim to foolish and insignificant men. Excuse me, children. For I cannot fathom nor support a man who will mistreat a women.        I truly believe we are to blame. We are too willing to follow suit and spend money and drink and act like fools trying to "persuade" or entice women into our beds and into our hearts. We've lost focus of creating and building our utopia. A perfect situation for not only ourselves but our futures. Fear not, the cowardice of acquaintances that might look at you sourly for telling a woman how amazing she looks. How powerful you think she is. The pure inspiration she may give you to pray to god that he would strike you down if you ever disappoint her. *this is where the rant begins* i noticed today that a very important person in my life whether they know or it or. It made a post in there blog saying "love Ian love anymore, it just doesn't mean the same thing." this was as devastating as if mike Tyson had given me a good right hook. This was my wake up call. "where did my mind go?" I used to tell people that really impacted me that I loved them. And surely I've told this person this I the past. And as amazing as I and the world sees her I felt the heart aching truth of all women. They just don't FEEL the love anymore...     This posting is in hopes that you remember your first love, man or woman. And you remember how powerful you felt when they told you they Loved you. How long it took, how hard you worked and waited. Just remember to change the world. If a woman does not like a polite and clean cut gentleman. Then you continue to show her why she should. Don't lose hop/faith. As much as I've thought when people say the right will find you. This is true, even if a woman must spend the majority of their life finding you, she will. Just make sure you remain a gentleman. Don't disappoint her when she finally gets to you . Peace. Love. And Chivalry! -Mr. Haymon